Farrell's Week 2 (A Little Late)

I'm a little behind in posting my Week 2 update.  Hosting your baby's 4th birthday party will do that to you.  

Anyway, so - Week 2 is done!  That's 20% of the program complete.  I've been trying to decide if these last two weeks flew by or if I've felt every minute of them.  I supposed I'm somewhere in between.  Before I get in to the details of Week 2, cause this post is bound to be a novel, I'll cut to the chase:  I'm still in to it.  

The exercise is awesome.  I really am feeling strong - especially in my upper body.  Sometimes I see my arms in the mirror and I have a "holy sh*t" moment because I can't believe I have muscles like that in my arms.  Two days ago, I kid you not, I noticed some ab definition.  I almost fell down in the bathroom.

This morning, when we had to do a quick set of push ups I managed 17 push ups (I think the instructor, Erik, counted up to 30 but I am just not that fast...yet).  Now, that in itself is not impressive.  What is impressive, however, is that on orientation day, we had to do push ups and I did 17 in 60 seconds.  I'd be willing to bet that this mornings quick set was done in 30-40 seconds.  I was definitely grinning at myself as I struggled to get that 17th one complete and back up to my feet for the next instruction. 

The kickboxing is so much fun.  My form is starting to get better, but I still have a long way to go on that.  I know some of my punches and kicks get sloppy because I'm tired and I'm just trying to get through it.  It's not easy but I really am focusing on getting better and making every movement count.  Except burn out this morning - I admit I didn't focus on form.  Erik told us to give it all we had - punches, kicks, whatever - I went at that bag like a mad woman or perhaps a rabid dog.  I'm positive it was ugly - but I'm equally as sure that I left everything on that mat this morning.  Yelling and grunting included.

Waking up at 4:15 is rough.  Once I get going in the morning, I'm fine.  But by the evening, I have no energy left and if I make it past 8:30pm I'm doing good.  This is fine (sort of) for now, but I can't see doing this forever.  I feel like I have no time with Joel like this.  Exercise, work, kids, dinner, pass out.  So either I get tougher and don't need to pass out at 8:30 or I have to figure out another time to exercise after the 10 week challenge is over.

And now for the part that is so much more difficult than hard physical workouts though I suppose it's a mental workout.  Nutrition.

My brain is trained on Weight Watchers.  I know points - not protein and carb counts.  It's been a HUGE, HUGE adjustment so far.  

1. I ate a lot of fruit on WW because it's "free" (0 points).  That's how I stayed full (and regular!).  With FXB, fruit = carbs so I'm limited and it's killing me.  Even if 80% of my daily carbs is fruit, that's still a significant overall reduction in fruit for me.
2. I am a point hoarder.  I typically always save points at the end of each day for a treat.  With FXB, there are no daily treats (at least not the kind I'm craving).  I really think part of why WW was so perfect for me was the flexibility and the fact that I could have a cookie or a chocolate every night.  This lack of even just one nibble of the leftover brownies from Lily's party is torture.
3. Which leads me to fun day - it's great.  HOWEVER.  I have no self control.  I've just denied myself all week long and fun day gets here and I eat whatever I want like a crazy person.  Well binging, fast food, junk, huge portions, etc is how I got so heavy in the first place.  So it feels very uncomfortable to me to be doing this.  So, "stop," you say.  Well, I can't seem to help myself.  Must work on this.
4. On WW, if I had a lunch with the girls one day and a party another day, I could just manage my points accordingly on those days.  With FXB, there is only 1 fun day per week so the flexibility throughout the week is dramatically reduced.  Now, I know that it's not supposed to be so hard and that I'm just supposed to make good choices at the lunch with the girls, but I find that I was better able to make good choices within WW guidelines & flexibility than I am the protein/carb counting guidelines.
5. If it's not already obvious, I am stressing myself out trying to do both WW and FXB programs at the same time.  I'm getting better at it, but it's still tough.  When you've reprogrammed yourself for 18 months to do things one way, it's very, very hard to change (though not unlike reprogramming myself to avoid sausage biscuits when I started WW).  Why don't I just drop WW altogether for now?  Well I tried and I can't.  When you have so much success with a program, it's just so scary to walk away from it and I just can't.  Plus I am using my WW app to get the nutritional info so I might as well just track there too.
6. Now, it's not all bad.  I have dramatically increased my water intake which has been great for my skin!  I now drink a minimum of 120 oz of water a day (compared to MAYBE 20-30 oz before).  If I drink 80-100 oz before noon, I allow myself to get a polar pop of Diet Coke (now 50% caffeine free).  I sip on that in the afternoon and then make myself drink another 40-60 oz of water after work.  So, yes, I pee at least 12 times a day.  But it's worth it for my Diet Coke!!  And my glowing skin.

People keep asking me if I'll go back to WW after the challenge is over and I probably will but with some definite modifications I've learned on FXB.  More water and more protein - for sure.  And maybe not a treat every day but probably more than just once a week.  This will help me stay away from the free for all style fun days (which I plan to correct while still ON FXB).  I still have 8 weeks to make up my mind about what will work for me long term.

The last bit I'm struggling with is the scale.  They tell you not to weigh yourself and I think that's smart.  However, in order to maintain my WW lifetime status, I have to weight myself once a week.  So far, I've gained weight.  I'm eating the same or less total points daily (of healthier things), drinking water like a fiend and exercising 6-7 days a week and I'm gaining.  This is hard to deal with.  I know it's from muscles gaining strength and I'm sure I have extra water weight among other unmentionable extras not letting go from my body - but it's still really hard to see the scale move up when I'm working so hard.

But - I don't weigh myself every day like I did on WW.  I put the scale in the closet except WW weigh in day.  That's a pretty huge shift for me.  I am trusting in the process.  If I follow the process to the very best of my ability, I will come out better for it in the long run.  Even if the scale moves up a few pounds.

Trust the process - that's my motto for week 3!

Week 2 Wacky Sock Wednesday!